Today the problem is not with the Spirit’s infilling but that many things apart from the Lord are occupying us. From morning to evening, our emotion desires many things that, though they may not be evil, filthy, or sinful, are not the Lord Himself. The grape juice may be good because it contains ingredients such as water and sugar, yet the grape juice is not the air. Our desires may be good, proper, and noble, yet these things are not the Lord Himself.
Ever since He saved us, the Lord has been continuously working to move us, demand of us, encourage us, and even wait for us to empty out the things that are occupying our emotion so that He can have the ground. However, what is our response? The Lord repeatedly touches us, and we are touched, but we do not move. The Lord repeatedly makes requests of us, but although we hear Him, we do not answer Him. Do we not realize that the things that we love and desire are not the Lord? Do we not realize that the Lord has been wrestling in us with the things that we desire? Sometimes we bargain with the Lord until He gives in. Even when we agree to the Lord’s requests, eventually we still break our promises.
Many times we encounter frustrations and difficulties that we cannot overcome. At those times we may yield to the Lord, saying, “O Lord! You are asking too much from me. Please reduce Your demand a little.” Our Lord is not cruel and will sometimes go along. Then we may have an inward sense of peace, and we may tell the Lord, “Lord, the difficulties are gone, and I want to love You more.” However, as time goes by, does our being change? What happened to our promises to the Lord? We are indeed unfaithful. Our emotion is still occupied by the matters that occupied us before. We still shut the door on the Lord, leaving Him outside the door. Our condition is like that of the church in Laodicea. Although we love the Lord and consistently pray and attend the meetings, we are not willing to practically pay a price, and in the end we become lukewarm. The Lord has no ground in us and has been shut outside the door by us, the lukewarm Laodiceans.
In Revelation the Lord says, “Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears My voice and opens the door, then I will come in to him and dine with him and he with Me” (3:20). The Lord desires to have mutual enjoyment with us. Even though He is in our spirit, we often shut Him outside the door. We shut Him outside the door of our emotion. Our spirit is like a refrigerator in which we keep the Lord. Therefore, the Lord has no way to enter into our inner chambers and into our heart. The Lord is standing and knocking in our cold spirit, longing to enter into our heart and our emotion, yet our heart remains so hard and cold.
Not only is our emotion like this, our mind is even more so. The Lord has hardly any ground in our mind. Our mind is filled with many things other than the Lord. Once a brother in Shanghai told a story concerning our mind. He said that there was a sister attending a meeting in which a brother was giving a message. This brother asked the sister how many chapters were in the Gospel of Matthew. She said that there were thirty-eight chapters. He then asked her how many chapters were in the Gospel of Mark. She replied that there were twenty-six chapters. The brother went on to ask her how many of her clothes were blue and how many were red. She answered that she had exactly five items of clothing that were blue and three that were red. This sister knew the number of clothes she had that were blue or red, but regarding the number of chapters in the Gospels of Matthew and Mark, her memory was confused. Her confusion in this regard indicated where her mind was. Since her mind was so occupied with her clothing, how could there be room reserved for the Lord? If our mind is like a glass that is fully occupied, how can the Lord occupy even a small part of it? Since we have been saved by grace, our thoughts and considerations may not be evil. However, neither are they the Lord Himself. In our mind we are continually thinking, calculating, and planning. We are unable to stop thinking for even a second. Only we ourselves know what we are thinking about.
What is our response when the Spirit touches us, enlightens us, gives us a feeling, or makes a request of us? We may still try to bargain with the Lord. Is this the way to give ground to the Spirit? No, when the Spirit makes a demand on us, we should immediately pay the price, lay down our opinions and desires, and deal with and get rid of all these things. To deal with and get rid of these things is to pay the price. This is the case not only with our emotion and mind but also with our will. How many of our opinions, decisions, and selections are of the Lord? The decisions we make in our will are mostly made for ourselves. Thus, the Spirit cannot fill us, and the Lord cannot spread into the three parts of our soul—our mind, emotion, and will. This is because our soul has been fully occupied by ourselves, not the Lord.