Unless we see this vision we will become numb to the growth in life. I have seen many who became numb to the growth in life. They still love the church; they still attend the meetings. But year after year you cannot see the addition of Christ in them. Rather you have to lament that the territory of Christ in their life has been reduced and reduced and reduced. But they have become numb so that they do not condemn their lack of growth in life. Meeting after meeting and message after message they are numb. With them there is no sensation. When the young people first come into the church life they are so sensitive. Just one message helps them. But with many of us message after message is taken in but no help is received. Something hidden is there which frustrates the growth in life. That is peculiarity.
Although some of you have been among us for eight or nine years, you have not gotten much growth in life. Christ has not been increasing within you. His territory within you has not been enlarged. Rather it has been restricted. This is simply because of your peculiarity. Nearly all of the ground of your being is occupied by this hidden thing, peculiarity. At the beginning of your Christian life or of your church life you had a lot of improvement and a lot of growth. You gave Christ more and more place, but after a certain time the territory of Christ in your Christian life stopped being enlarged. Now it is restricted all the time.
We have to consider this as a very serious matter. We have to ask the Lord for His mercy to be rescued from this problem. We simply cannot do anything. The only thing we can do is to realize we have such a problem. If you can realize that you have such a problem, you are very close to the border of being rescued. The realization that comes from such a vision nearly becomes your rescue. Then you will begin to have no confidence in your being. You will realize that some hidden problem is concealed in your being, your peculiarity. Once we have such a realization of this problem, we will become fearful and trembling in the Lord. This will be a great rescue to us.
Peculiarity is very deep within our being and occupies us subtly from experiencing Christ. We may consider this person is peculiar or that person is peculiar, but, in fact, we all have peculiarity. We are all sick of the disease of peculiarity. Peculiarity is a very subtle thing. If you consider that a certain person is peculiar, it must be that his peculiarity is not so subtle because it is very apparent. Because it is on the surface everyone is clear about it. But your peculiarity may be very subtle. It may be deeply hidden within you. Not only do others fail to see it, even you yourself cannot discern your peculiarity. You do not realize that you have a serious and terrible peculiarity because it is so hidden within you.
Not one person has no peculiarity! Every fallen descendant of Adam is a peculiar person. As long as we are descendants of the fallen Adam, we are peculiar. This is a principle. If it is difficult for you to discover my peculiarity, it simply proves my peculiarity is more subtle. It is hidden in the many good aspects of my character and being. This kind of hidden peculiarity is the strongest controller and director of your being. Whatever you do is controlled by this hidden peculiarity. Even your spirituality is under its direction. This is even the reason people can see your spirituality. People cannot see your hidden peculiarity. Your spirituality is like a kite and your peculiarity is like a hidden person holding the kite string. Your spirituality is under the control of such a subtle, hidden thing—your peculiarity.
Years ago, from about 1932, I began to realize that within the seeking Christians there was a kind of hidden peculiarity. At that time I didn’t see so much the hidden peculiarity but I saw the apparent peculiarity. I only saw that certain people were quite peculiar because their peculiarity was on the surface. I did not realize that actually everyone is peculiar. After many years of experience and observation, I realize that not one person is not peculiar. I have met many very spiritual people and with every one of them there was a kind of peculiarity. This bothered me. Before I met them I heard about them and I read their books. I got much help from them and I respected them. From reading their books I had a very high imagination concerning them. But after I met them and stayed with them, I became disappointed. I cannot say that they were bad; they were all good. But the disappointing thing was that all of them had a kind of peculiarity. I was disappointed when I discovered these spiritual persons did not match my dream concerning them.
Then I began to consider myself. I realized my peculiarity might be stronger than theirs. Now I really sympathize with others because I realize that we all have peculiarity. No two faces are exactly the same, and no two peculiarities are exactly the same. Every man’s peculiarity is different. People’s faces may be somewhat easy to describe: some are round; others are long; others may be square. But people’s peculiarity is very difficult to name and to denominate.