Throughout the centuries scholars and philosophers have tried their best to find out the meaning of the universe and the meaning of human life. None of them has ever found the proper answer. But the Lord’s simple illustration in John 15 of a vine and branches and a husbandman reveals nothing less than this.
I was saved as a teen-ager over fifty-six years ago and since then have never fallen away. Yet for many years in the early period of my Christian life, I did not know what God’s economy was. I tried my best to love Him, to study the Bible, and to testify of Him to others, but I was ignorant of His economy. (This word in Greek as used in the New Testament means a dispensing of something in a kind of administration; a stewardship to dispense something into certain vessels.)
One day I saw that God chose and redeemed us with a purpose, a purpose so high that no human mentality can grasp it. It is that the Triune God, the infinite God, wants to dispense Himself into our being. Then I began to understand why God created us tripartite. We have a body outwardly, a spirit within, and in between a soul. Just as a glove is made for a hand, so we were designed for God to get into us.
We have the wrong impression that we must do something for God. Christianity has instilled in us the concept that we should serve God, preach the gospel, win souls, improve our behavior, honor our parents, love our enemies, and be kind and humble. This is the kind of Christian I tried to be for years, without ever realizing that God did not want this.
God does not want you to do things by yourself for Him. If He wants something done, He can do it Himself. In creating this universe, He just spoke and it came into existence. When He said, “Let there be light,” there was light. God does not need you to work so hard! Mankind, with all his religions, is off from God’s goal. God would have us take Him as life. This God is embodied in Christ. Outside of Christ you cannot find God. Christ is God, the practical God, not the doctrinal God. This God is to be your life and your person.
Before I realized this, I hated my sins, my evil deeds, and my bad temper. I tried to love the Lord and to work for Him. But one day the Lord said, “My little child, I don’t want you. I want Myself. Even if you were not so ugly, if you were lovely and excellent, I still would not want you. You can never satisfy Me. I want Myself, but it must be Myself in you. Once you take Me and leave your self out, I shall be happy.”
When I saw that vision, I prayed, “Lord, have mercy on me. From now on I shall never live by my self.” After that prayer I felt I had wings. I wanted to run into the street and proclaim to everyone that from then on I would live by Christ, that it was no more I but Christ living in me. All this was more than forty years ago.
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