Our disposition is what we are by birth, our natural makeup. In our experience, our disposition is found in the “I,” the old man, the self, and the soul-life. Although there are no verses in the New Testament that clearly define the disposition, its significance is implied in certain portions of the Word. Galatians 2:20 says, “I have been crucified with Christ, and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me.” In this verse, the disposition is implied by the old “I,” which has been crucified with Christ. In Matthew 16:21-26 and Luke 9:22-25 the disposition is implied by the self (Matt. 16:24; Luke 9:23, 25) and the soul-life (Matt. 16:25-26; Luke 9:24). In Matthew 16:22 Peter rebuked the Lord Jesus according to his disposition. Peter’s disposition was mainly expressed in his quickness and in his taking the lead to express himself. Peter, as the spokesman of the twelve disciples, took the lead to express himself on many occasions. None of the other disciples exceeded Peter in this matter. We each have our own disposition. According to our disposition, we also may be quick to express ourselves as Peter did. On the other hand, according to our disposition, we may be persons who rarely say something to express ourselves.
Our disposition is the most difficult part of our being to deal with, and often there is a particular part of our disposition that is the hardest to deal with. It seems that a mountain can be moved more easily than certain parts of our disposition. Our disposition is a part of our self. As Christians, we have to live Christ by rejecting our self. We must learn to act against our disposition.
According to my observation over many years, the real enemy of our growth in the divine life is our disposition. Our disposition is also the factor that spoils our usefulness in the hand of the Lord. Shortly after I was saved, I received the vision of the Lord’s recovery through the writings of Brother Nee, and I left the denomination with which I was meeting. In 1932 the Lord raised up a church in my locality, and in 1934 I began to work with Brother Nee. Since that time, as one caring for the church and the work, I have had contact with many people and have come to know them. I have learned that many saints eventually stopped growing in the divine life and could make no further progress. For the first few years of their Christian life they grew in the divine life very quickly. Eventually, however, their growth stopped due to a particular, peculiar aspect of their disposition. They had given up the world and had sacrificed many things for the Lord. They also listened to the messages and loved them. However, a particular, peculiar aspect remained in their being. That part of their makeup became a stronghold that held them back from making progress in the growth in life. There is little possibility for such saints to progress. Some saints have not grown in life for fifty years.
I have also seen some very promising saints who loved the Lord, sacrificed for Him in many ways, received a high education, and had much experience in sufferings and in the human life. As a rule, such ones are very useful to the Lord. However, because of a particular, peculiar aspect of their makeup, their usefulness was annulled. They did not insist on holding onto this aspect of their being; it simply remained in them and spoiled and stopped their usefulness.
Our particular traits can be compared to the grain in a piece of wood. A carpenter prefers to use wood that has an even grain. If the carpenter finds a piece of wood with an irregular grain, he will not use it. A piece of wood may be of good quality, but if it has a knot or a burl, it cannot be sawed easily; it is not useful. The Christians who do not have any peculiarity, any peculiar traits, are the ones who grow the most and the fastest. Likewise, the brothers and sisters who are the most useful are the ones who do not have any peculiar traits. In the service, the ones who are the most useful are the ones who always reject and deny what they are.
I have been observing the situation in the church for many years. When I was with Brother Nee, I saw a number of cases of rebellion, and in Taiwan and the United States I have seen several such cases. If we would diagnose these cases of rebellion, we could see that the source of the rebellion was the disposition of the persons involved. With almost no exceptions, the cause of each person’s involvement in rebellion was their peculiar traits. On the one hand, many of the dear saints who have been involved in a rebellion were very useful. On the other hand, there was a “burl” within them, causing something negative to grow and accumulate. The “burl” eventually annulled their usefulness and led to rebellion. Many other dear saints, however, have not rebelled, but they were more useful in former years than they are today. They have remained in the church, but their usefulness has been annulled by their disposition. In the Christian life and in the work, disposition is a great negative factor.
Home | First | Prev | Next