Paul also said that he was appointed to be a teacher of the Gentiles (2:7). He was a “coach” to teach men (v. 8), women (vv. 9-15; 3:11), and also the elders and deacons (vv. 1-10, 12-13). If we carefully read the qualifications of an elder, we may feel that only angels can be elders. In all of Christianity, and even among us, many elders are too poorly qualified because they have not been trained. Verse 2 of chapter three says concerning the qualifications of an elder, “The overseer then must be without reproach, the husband of one wife, temperate, of a sober mind, orderly, hospitable, apt to teach.” To be orderly is to be decorous, to fit the situation. The root word for orderly in Greek denotes to decorate something to be not only comely but also practical, to give it beauty in practicality. This means that an elder must be equipped and remade. The way to be remade is by receiving training. To be trained is to be remade to become beautiful, useful, and thus adaptable to any environment. For example, if we buy a piece of cloth but do no work on it, it will not be useful for anything. A curtain is not merely a hanging piece of cloth. In order for a cloth to become a curtain, it must be measured, cut, and sewn to fit the environment of the window.
In the spring of 1935 several co-workers were living together. I was assigned to live in the same room with an older brother. The room at that time was very small, and not every room had its own sink for water, so we had to bring water into the room to wash ourselves. Because the room was small, the headboard of the bed reached almost to the opposite wall, leaving only a narrow path to walk through. As a result I was careful every time I carried in water, being afraid that if I shook the bowl, I would spill water on the brother’s bed as I passed by. Sometimes even though I did not shake the bowl, some water still dripped from the bottom. Every time I spilled water on his bed, I would immediately confess. I needed to confess almost every day, and eventually this brother became annoyed.
One day as he was fellowshipping with another brother, he told him that although confessing is good, it is better not to make a mistake. At this time I also was there, and when I heard this, I wanted to hide in a hole. Nevertheless, I could not avoid using water. When I spilled some on the brother’s bed, I made a mistake, and when I made a mistake, I needed to confess. If I confessed, however, it would annoy the brother, but if I did not confess, my conscience would have no peace. This was very difficult for me. Still, the brother’s word was meek and full of wisdom: “Although confessing is good, it is better not to make a mistake.” On the one hand, I was embarrassed, but on the other hand, I tried hard to consider how not to make a mistake. Gradually, I realized that because I was used only to living in my own room, I could not easily adapt to the environment of two people living together. That was the reason that I could not do even something so small. After this consideration, I changed my way. First I wiped the water from the bottom of the bowl, and then I practiced putting less water into it. In addition, I began to walk with my back to the brother’s bed, so that even if the water dripped it would fall on the floor. In this way I adapted to the environment. The brother’s word—“Although confessing is good, it is better not to make a mistake”—gave me the opportunity to be remade so that I could adapt to the new environment.
Those who attend the training and live at the training center are daily trained to not make mistakes rather than to continually need to confess. Living together is not easy. When you do something small, it affects others, and if you do it again, you need to confess. We may illustrate this with our meals. For the sake of the overseas trainees, the training center arranged to prepare both Chinese and Western food, according to the way the trainees registered. When the mealtimes came, however, some who registered for Chinese food went to take Western food. Eventually, there was Chinese food left over but not enough Western food. Perhaps those trainees thought that they simply wanted a taste of Western food, but this caused them to be unruly and not able to adapt to the environment. They should not be loose in choosing the kind of food to eat. They should neither make a decision without authorization nor freely invite others to come and eat as they like. This is an expression of not adapting to the environment. We must be careful, adapt to the environment, be regulated, and act in order.
One who serves the Lord must be able to adapt to any given situation. In a meeting, for example, five sisters may sit on the same small bench. If one of the sisters feels that the bench is too crowded, she may push her way onto a bench where some brothers are sitting. However, to do this is uncomely. Do not think that this standard is too high. If a person is loose, whoever he may be, he cannot serve the Lord. Not many who serve the Lord are able to accomplish much. According to my observation, the reason for this is that we are persons who are not only created but also fallen and even contaminated.
Man is born in a fallen condition. Then after a person is born, he becomes contaminated at home, in school, and in society. He may not learn many good things at home, in school, or in the human community, but instead he may unconsciously learn many bad things. Then these things become his constitution. Even if they are not sinful, they may still be contaminating. It seems reasonable to push one’s way onto a bench where there is more room, but in actuality it is not proper. Today our society is chaotic and full of competition, but in the church life we should be separated and in a proper order.
According to the rules, a bench should seat four people. One day in the meeting, however, a large brother may sit on a bench and not leave enough room for three others. What then should we do? For the brother to sit there takes space away from others, causing them to suffer. Should we assign another seat to him? It is true that he is large, but it is not of his own choosing that he is that way. Perhaps he himself also finds it troublesome. Therefore, we need to be understanding with him. He is our brother, born of the same Father. Our Father is sovereign over everything, and He causes all things to work together for good. Therefore, for the large brother to sit next to us is also for good. This kind of good work is for us to experience the cross. Paul rebuked the brothers in 1 Corinthians 6 for going to court against each other. He said, “Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be defrauded?” (v. 7); that is, why not let others take advantage of you? In all these matters, we must receive the sovereign arrangement of the Father and bear the cross.
On the other hand, the large brother needs to realize that he may inconvenience others, particularly in the meetings. He should therefore exercise self-control for his own health’s sake and for the sake of others as well. In the meeting he should not sit so as to convenience himself but rather occupy only three-quarters of the space he needs. In addition, he should be willing not to sit between persons but at the end of the bench. This is to adapt to one’s environment. If the saints can exercise in this way, there will be no difficulties in the church. Therefore, we all need to be trained and learn to accommodate every kind of situation.
Rooming with someone who snores is another example of our need to adapt. Someone who snores is usually unconscious of it. Even when others are affected and unable to sleep, he can still sleep in peace. Therefore, one who snores should warn others about it without being embarrassed. Since it is God who created him with this characteristic, he should not deny it but admit it humbly and inform others beforehand so that they can make the necessary arrangements. On the other hand, if you room with someone who snores and keeps you from sleeping, you need to accept it in peace. This may be an opportunity for you to watch and pray throughout the night, adapting to the environment by redeeming the time. It may be that you already had the desire to watch and pray in the night but were unable to do it by yourself. Now here is someone to give you a helping hand. You may pray, “O Lord, thank You for giving me a snoring brother to help me to watch and pray in the night. Lord, perhaps this is a judgment from You, because I knew that I should fast, watch, and pray, but I never did it. Now You have given me an opportunity to room with this snoring brother. Lord, thank You because You can never be wrong.” This is to accommodate to the environment.
When we begin to learn to serve the Lord, it is very necessary to be able to adapt to our environment. We need this in our dealing with our family, our dealing with others, and all the more in our co-working with others. We need it to deal with the elders, the deacons, and all the saints. All these lessons will come when we begin to serve the Lord. Serving the Lord is like being in a family. According to the Lord’s ordination, a husband and a wife cannot be divorced, and neither one can abandon his or her own children. However, the experienced ones know that this is not easy. A sister once testified that because going out to knock on doors requires three people to be on a team, she and her husband were once put on the same team with a third saint. Originally, she and her husband could not get along with each other, but because of the coordination in the church life, they now needed to get along. It is true that a husband and wife will not always get along well, but they cannot be separated or divorced; a marriage cannot be dissolved. Our serving the Lord and our relationship with the saints in the church are like the relationship between family members, which cannot be dissolved. If someone wants to be separated, he will separate himself from everyone for the rest of his life, because no one will be able to match him. Therefore, we must train ourselves to accommodate to the environment and to others.
The Bible speaks about honoring parents. The real meaning of honoring is to accommodate our parents. Some children may seem to honor their parents very much, but when the time comes to give the parents their medicine, the children dictate the way to give it to them. This is not the meaning of honoring. If parents are forced to listen to their children’s way to eat and do other things, the children are not honoring them. To honor one’s parents is to accommodate them. If they want to eat cold food, we should serve them cold food, and if they want to eat slowly, we must let them eat slowly. Whatever request they have, we should accommodate them. This is to honor them. For a family to have peace, it all depends on the adaptability of every member. To be sure, if everyone moves according to his own will, there will be no peace in the family. There is peace only if a wife can accommodate her husband and a husband can accommodate his wife. If both sides are able to accommodate, accommodation will not be a matter of concern. If you accommodate him and he accommodates you, both will be accommodated, and there will be real peace. The church life is a living in which all the members accommodate one another. It is the same with the co-workers who live together.
First and 2 Timothy speak of our need to be trained in our whole being. Paul says in 1 Timothy 3:14-15, “These things I write to you, hoping to come to you shortly. But if I delay, I write that you may know how one ought to conduct himself in the house of God.” This indicates our need for training.
Every man has three parts—a spirit, a soul, and a body. In order for us to serve the Lord properly, all these parts need to be exercised. Not only does our spirit need to exercise, but our soul and body also need to exercise. First Timothy 4:8 refers to bodily exercise. Then 2 Timothy 1:7 says, “For God has not given us a spirit of cowardice, but of power and of love and of sobermindedness.” To have this kind of spirit and mind also indicates our exercise. Finally, Paul says, “The Lord be with your spirit” (4:22). God has given us a strong spirit, and the Lord Jesus is in our spirit, so we need to exercise our spirit. In addition, other passages in 1 and 2 Timothy speak of the exercise related to our sober mind, which is a part of our soul (1 Tim 2:9; 3:2). Hence, we see that 1 and 2 Timothy speak about the exercise of our whole being. All three parts of our being—spirit, soul, and body—need to be trained.
If we are living alone, we have the choice of being loud or quiet, but if we live with others, our going in and out of the room should be soft and not too loud. This requires learning and is also an exercise of the body. In addition, we often speak of the need to be soberminded. The actual meaning of sobermindedness is that our mind is properly balanced and self-controlled. However, very few of us have this kind of mind. That is why it is one of the requirements for being an elder. An elder’s mind must be proper, stably balanced, and self-controlled. The exercise of the mind is a very difficult matter. One who does not lose his temper is one whose mind is balanced and self-controlled.
To exercise the mind is to exercise the soul. The cultivation of our nature, which the Chinese speak of, is nothing more than the exercise of the mind. We are fallen and have been permeated with many bad habits. Many of the problems are due to our mind. Therefore, the Bible often speaks of the proper exercise of our mind. Our body needs exercise, our spirit needs exercise, and we need even more training for our soul. If we exercise in this way, I believe that we can be men above all men. Not only can we serve the Lord, but everything we do will be excelling and of a high standard.
Furthermore, we need to pay attention to the training of our character. We need to exercise and practice in a serious way according to our book Character. This is important not only for our spirit but for our body and our soul also. Our whole spirit, soul, and body need to be trained. Only then can we have a proper character and a long-term service that is of life.
(A message given on February 11, 1987 in Taipei, Taiwan)